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Search for Spiritual Meaning in Suffering



It’s been more than a year since I blogged. Now I am feeling the need to write again, at least on paper and not just in my head.  But the order of the day is dishes and laundry, or should I say week.

The dishes and laundry are both mounting like a dump yard on garbage day. Not a sight one wants to imagine. But this past year since Ron died (Dec. 2013) has been like dwelling in a deep dark hole, a dump yard filled with depression, guilt, and the regrets that are a normal part of grieving. Nothing has felt normal, however, during this time, I have felt lost, trying to find out who I am apart from Ron. I had never lived on my own. We started dating when we were 16 and 19 when I still lived with my parents and siblings until the day I was married—56 ½ years.

Ron was a man of prayer, and I always knew that when he passed, I would feel lost without those supporting prayers, but I could not anticipate how much his prayers sustained me, and how empty I feel without them. MORE continued. . .